I see you joking, hoping no one can tell
how you're hiding behind that smile I know so well.
Take a step back. Get another perspective.
You might see things a little bit different.
People these days get too obsessive with the
assessment of themselves through the eyes of those around them.
The mayhem begins when fear and pride come,
walking side by side, and invite themselves in.
Then you contemplate, formulate ideas that aid the hate.
This hate is an attack on your slate. Trying to create
marks forming you into a work made of lies and pain.
They tell you you're not worth it,
drawing light to your past mistakes.
"This is proof! You'll never be desired that way."
These lies have a volume, going up and down.
But the 'off switch' button can't be found.
During the day, through the night.
They become your companion, they won't leave your side.
At times you doubt them and start to appeal for Truth.
Deep inside, you know they're lies.
So you decide to stand up and fight.
The battle is difficult and draining.
You find yourself desperately seeking
for a way out. You just want to run.
Keep in mind this battle has already been won.
You aren't sure of it, this victory.
Yet its just around the bend. You wait and see.
Its hard to take comfort in the unknown.
Especially when you feel like you're alone.
Trust is hard, I understand.
But fall into His arms if you can.
And remember He knows, He has an Ultimate Plan.
Your entire life, it lies in His hands.
In honor of the amazing time we had at Jesus Culture, Colorado Springs on Saturday Night. :)
Its the end of Easter weekend... I spent Sorrowful Friday with my sisters as we knelt before the foot of the cross together, weeping. A few different things became more clear to me that evening. The heart of the disciples during that day and the next day was what hit me the hardest. Having your dearest friend brutally abused, beaten, stabbed, ripped, torn, and very broken right before your eyes... Seeing Him take His last breath. Repeating His words in your head over and over, trying to make sense of them... Jesus' buddies didn't know He was going to come back to life a few days later. To them, He was gone.
Last night, I found out a wonderful young man that helped a lot with my youth group died in a rock climbing accident. I didn't know him very well... We had only talked a few times. Yet I always enjoyed just being around him and watching him interact with others. His smile lit up the whole room. He accepted everyone, regardless of where they've been. He was crazy about life... Wore rolled up jeans, flannels, a knit beanie over his dreaded dark blonde hair, and tried not to wear shoes as much as possible. Such a hippie.. He had this excited look in his eyes, making you want to know of all the adventures he had been on. He seemed to genuinely love those around him, even if he didn't know them that well.
This morning I woke up and instead of rejoicing at remembrance of Christ's Resurrection, I felt so heavy. For a few minutes, I couldn't figure out why. Then I recalled last night. I lay in bed for another half an hour, just thinking.
"How could he be gone?"
Part of me feels selfish for grieving his death, simply because I wasn't close to him. So who am I to be able to grieve the loss of him?
The rest of me is in shock... Only a few weeks ago, I passed him in the hall and said, "Hey!" thinking he had a great smile. I will never see his smile again. How simple smiles are... But the impact they have... It blows my mind.
Where ever you are in life, whoever you are around... Smile. You don't know how much longer you have here on earth to do that simple action. You don't know who is watching you, thinking, "That person has a great smile." You don't know who needs a gentle touch of warmth that you can give by smiling. What I do know is that our time here is so terribly short. Savor each moment, live intentionally, create memories, love deeply, and remember that every breath is a second chance.
"Hold onto the small things and make them worth fighting for"
Last night, I found out a wonderful young man that helped a lot with my youth group died in a rock climbing accident. I didn't know him very well... We had only talked a few times. Yet I always enjoyed just being around him and watching him interact with others. His smile lit up the whole room. He accepted everyone, regardless of where they've been. He was crazy about life... Wore rolled up jeans, flannels, a knit beanie over his dreaded dark blonde hair, and tried not to wear shoes as much as possible. Such a hippie.. He had this excited look in his eyes, making you want to know of all the adventures he had been on. He seemed to genuinely love those around him, even if he didn't know them that well.
This morning I woke up and instead of rejoicing at remembrance of Christ's Resurrection, I felt so heavy. For a few minutes, I couldn't figure out why. Then I recalled last night. I lay in bed for another half an hour, just thinking.
"How could he be gone?"
Part of me feels selfish for grieving his death, simply because I wasn't close to him. So who am I to be able to grieve the loss of him?
The rest of me is in shock... Only a few weeks ago, I passed him in the hall and said, "Hey!" thinking he had a great smile. I will never see his smile again. How simple smiles are... But the impact they have... It blows my mind.
Where ever you are in life, whoever you are around... Smile. You don't know how much longer you have here on earth to do that simple action. You don't know who is watching you, thinking, "That person has a great smile." You don't know who needs a gentle touch of warmth that you can give by smiling. What I do know is that our time here is so terribly short. Savor each moment, live intentionally, create memories, love deeply, and remember that every breath is a second chance.
"Hold onto the small things and make them worth fighting for"